Do you want to get stuck in life, carry chronic stress, or remain in persistent conflicts?. If so, here’s what to do. Oversimplify things, failing to see the subtleties and complexities. Then, to compensate for your oversimplified view of the...
Walking the path to transformation can be a lonely journey. When you set out on your own, and part ways with the pack, it is always, in some ways, a solitary undertaking.
Yet even while you’re finding your own way, you’re surrounded...
Anger mobilizes power. In an oppressive world, we are made to feel powerless and act powerlessly. To work on behalf of social justice, we need to break out of feeling powerless, to get our voices back, to get in action. Anger helps make all this...
You want one thing. Your partner wants another. Do you need to compromise, so neither of you really gets what you want? Does one person need to sacrifice, perhaps at the cost of resenting the other? Is there any way for both of you to win?
You’re...
Dating and counseling are two of my favorite relational forms! They may seem unrelated at first, but both share the goal of creating an unusual depth of intimacy in an unusually short period of time.
To be a compelling counselor, you need to...
If you want a fulfilling life, you need fulfilling relationships. But what makes a relationship fulfilling? In a word, intimacy. Intimacy is the experience of feeling genuinely connected instead of separate, sensing that you and someone else are a...
Your relationship with desire strongly influences the quality of your life. If you don’t know what you want, how can you be guided toward the things that will fulfill you most? Unless you sense your own desire, how can you know what you...
No one wants to feel sorry for themselves. It’s got a pretty bad rap. I mean, who wants to wallow in self-pity, or stay stuck in the victim role, or dwell on the past?
Yet we do feel sorry for ourselves, and for good reason. People wrong...
Your thoughts are not your own. Many of your most private, most personal thoughts are not actually yours at all.
Think about it: you are no more the creator of your mind than you are of your body. Though you can influence your body’s shape...
How do you decide if you want to have sex with someone? Presumably you would choose someone you’re attracted to in some compelling way. Mutual interest on their part also seems to be a key ingredient. Once you’ve got those basics established,...
